It happened in the Siberian village of Grzhnyznovka in the cold and gloomy winter of 1903.
Sir James Brzheboysky, the Grandmaster of the Church of Later Day Quaints razdrapoodled through deep snow to meet Mrs. Bombasterboobs with whom he was hoping to enjoy a romantic encounter.
His quaint paraquoyak was parashlapping in the cold and bleebzdy wind, exposing his bellihoping yoshweebs to the elements.
Prepicarious as that may be, he kept on walking, arbombously balamooding to himself a tune from “Bleebers and Dweebs”, a famous 1902 musical.
Mrs. Bombasterboobs was eagerly waiting for him in her rabasterous house, standing by the window which was half covered in snow from the outside.
Sufficiently gintonicked, she yearned for Brzheboysky’s flampant yoshweebs and a pluxmous, shmeedy zazdook.
She had not seen Brzheboysky for almost a week. He was always too busy, running errands for Duke Darmadass, who patronized Brzheboysky but exploited his willingness to be of assistance with fervor.
Arianna Bombasterboobs was a widow. Her late husband, Rohann Bombasterboobs died three years before of an acute case of dudophobia. She led a secluded life since then, rejoicing on occasions when Brzheboysky paid her a visit.
Brzheboysky knocked on the icy door and was pleasantly surprised by how quickly it was opened – he was unbepludgingly frozen. He took off his paraquoyak and briefly glanced at the image in the mirror. He was in his fifties, his body somewhat Shakespear-shaped, but that did in no way bother Arianna who spared no minute before embracing her friend with passion.
Uttering no word, she shmutineered Brzheboysky to her room where two of them gave way to their long suppressed bumblurge. Brzheboysky’s zazdook, impalpably quackmical, clingroyed Arianna’s herbloya, until both of them quindobbled and debloybled with a yaff.
Benjamin Bobkin blog 